Faith

Archived Posts from this Category

November 17, 2013

“Even If You Lose Everything.”

Posted by Gesuschic under Faith, My Crazy Faith | Tags: , , , |
1 Comment 

So here I am. 41 years old, sharing a bedroom with my oldest daughter in the home of my best friend from childhood and her husband. My boys are across the hall and my youngest daughter down the hall. I tried, no…no. I did…my best. But it wasn’t enough.
The story of my life right?
Every single chapter keeps ending the same way for me. I pour all that I am into all that I have and circumstances beyond my control slam into my life and POOF.
It’s all gone.
Everything I worked for.
Starting over and over again is getting to be a challenge. However, I won’t let it break me. One day eventually it will all pay off. If I stop believing that then I lose all hope and then I’ll really be in trouble.
I try to teach my kids that no matter what, stay true to you. Don’t ever allow the actions of another determine who you’re going to be. The one thought that goes through my head day-to-day is the fact God has the big picture of my life. I may never see it, but I know there are things going on that would probably blow my freakin’ mind in the spiritual…I can’t stop moving. If Ruth packed up and went back to her family Boaz never would have found her.
Rahab was Boaz momma, perhaps that’s why he had a heart for Ruth because of who his mom was. Did you know Ruth ended up being the great-grandmother of David, who is the lineage Of Jesus?
Rahab…when she helped the two spies sent by Joshua, no way could she have known that one day…one day she would be great-grandmother of the Savior of the world…or great-great grandma? But my point being, she was a well-known harlot who did the right thing that could have cost her life.
Bathsheba too, a great-grandmother of Jesus. I mean when you really dig into Jesus and His lineage… Tamara, Ruth, Rehab, BathSheba…Holy crap man, NONE of them were even Jewish!!!
Seriously, the family of Jesus beats even the cray of the crazy. The Hatfields and The McCoys. Just pondering on those facts alone how can I think that I’m not a part of something so much bigger than even I yet or may ever know?
I’ve lost everything. A few times, lol But just like Ruth, just like Rahab, just like every single riff~raff in the Bible I WILL keep going. Is it wrong to say or think “it may always be an up hill battle?” Perhaps to some. But when I look at the life of Jesus and all who followed Him their rewards were after death. Not that I’m waiting to die or anything, haha I’m just living…trying to focus on moving forward with one foot in front of the other looking for that favor, counting those blessings and anticipating that beautiful blessed hope that is to come.
It sucks to struggle. I will never understand why some do and some don’t but what I do know is that whatever cup I am given in this life keeps me at His feet…I will drink it.
Jesus is all I need.
If there is anything my children take away from me, it’s truly that.
Nothing but Jesus.
Starting over at 40? Big deal man. There is no real relevance in material things. No matter how nice they may be to have. The real relevance is in your life. How you lived it, how much you loved those around you, how you treated them and complete strangers and who you walked with 😉 Today is the oldest and youngest you will ever be, and tomorrow isn’t promised to no one. So live, laugh and walk with Him who matters most even if it means you may have to lose everything to keep you right there.

Selah….,
*Gesuschic

 

March 24, 2013

“A Move Of God…”

Posted by Gesuschic under Faith | Tags: , , |
Leave a Comment 

 I have these moments where I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit and there are days where I know He is walking beside me because I can sense His Spirit all around But there is something so precious and so…crazy gentle about an actual “move of God” that nobody would ever be able to explain. In an odd way, for me, it’s like childbirth. You can hear a thousand different women explain their story and every single one is different.
Ironic huh?
Whenever you encounter a move of the Holy Ghost there is a re-birthing if you will of your faith, your purpose…your whole mindset of why you ever believed in the first place. Sometimes it can be the most beautiful experience ever in your life, then there are times where you are being lead by mercy to purge the very things you cling to as a safety precaution from getting hurt, and it can be painful. The Holy Spirit is such a complete gentleman though, He moves in a way that each breath you take is letting go of whatever it is you need to let go of so He can begin to enter in… “one…two…two…two…ready?…Okay…three….four…it’s okay, I’ve got time” He whispers.
Pastor Matt spoke about Altars tonight, very brief but it was insane because right where I stood I made my own altar in my mind. I think actual “moves of God” are few and far between because there are so many factors that need to be in place. Everyone there, everyone needs to be in one accord. The same frame of mind, having the same goal.
Everyone must be in the same spiritual frame of mind where their soul, body and spirit meet. And that is why they’re rare.
Your soul needs to be completely vulnerable to the Holy Spirit.
Your body needs to be in complete stand still with your heart preparing itself for what is about to happen.
And your spirit 100% seeking.
Right then, in that exact moment…all three things come into an agreement that whatever God is about to do, it’s okay, it’s okay…you’re ready. Right then the sweetest, most gentle anointing begins to fall. And there is no question that everyone in that room is feeling exactly the same way as you’re feeling. It’s strong enough to make a grown man weep yet gentle enough a child can feel it.
Some are so overwhelmed they fall to their knees, others stand and sob, pass out, shake, cry, whisper, pace back and forth…everyone different but the feeling is the same.
It’s a presence so amazing the only way I can describe it, is as if Jesus Himself had just walked through the doors of the Church and was walking slowly down the aisle. You could almost smell a soft aroma of peace.
Insane I know, it sounds so insane…
I’m sure at some point in your Christian walk you’ve questioned why you even deserve Jesus’ grace, love and mercy but when God moves…His power, glory, authority, His righteousness just becomes so clear, those doubts of everything you feel are faded by the most loving being you’ll ever encounter…The Holy Spirit.
Pastor Matt is 100% correct, you cannot rush this. As a broken hearted people we feel leery of vulnerability. It can be frightening. So when there is a group of us together, and I mean truly together…God cannot be rushed by a mere time on a clock. One day is as a 1,000 to Him, and if He moved swiftly, any sudden move, I believe would quench what was about to happen. When God moves in your whole entire world…it will take time, and the Holy Spirit is such a gentleman, time is what He will give to get us to where He see’s us already.
Man…God is such an awesome God of Omnipotence. One of the most amazing attributes of His character that we take for granted.
I am BLOWN away.
Tonight, for me…a re-birthing of my faith, my purpose. ALL that I am, EVERYTHING I have…His.
From my hands I freely give to Him all of my hopes, my dreams, my shame, my brokenness, my anger, my children, my fears, my doubt, my complete surrender in exchange for Him to allow me to just embrace the intimacy of His precious Holy Spirit. That tangible touch I so desperately need. 

Selah…
Cheryl