We lived in the east side of Columbus, Ohio. Yes, it was known as “the ghetto.” Our big huge green house literally sat in an alleyway and had no drive way. My house was so close to the railroad tracks, whenever I was on the phone with a friend and that train was going by, my friend would say “OH MY GOSH WHAT IS THAT?” Hahaha…As a kid, I freaking hated that. It was incredibly embarrassing, loud, and the epitome of uncool, haha
But every single night, usually right after supper, my Grandpa would go outside to the gate at the front of our house and stand. Our good and faithful German Shepherd by his side, Skipper. And every so often I’d see my Gramps with his marlboro red cigarette in his left hand, raise up his right and wave. Skip would run back and forth along the fence, barking at the loud train going by as if he wanted nothing more in life than to be given the chance to chase after it.
I think I was around 12 or 13 years old when one day I asked him;
“Grandpa, why are you waving at that stupid train?”
He looked down at me as he took the cigaret from his mouth, exhaled the smoke from the left side corner of his mouth, laughed two chuckles and said:
“Tommie-Girl, the man sitting in the caboose. His job is to look after everything and make sure the crew have a safe place to rest.”
For YEARS I watched as my Grandpa would stand out there and wave at the man sitting in the caboose. I would even see him wave back from time to time. As if he looked for my Grandpa and our old barking German Shepherd.
 From time to time as I got older, in my life I would always refer to myself in the “spiritual sense” as being the caboose of Christianity. Even being married to the Youth Pastor I was the last to know anything, the last to be invited anywhere, the last to be thought of when making plans, always the last at anything. I was never good at being apart of an “inner circle” ever in my life, haha Kind of like the third verse of a hymn. You hear people in church use the term “BE THE HEAD AND NOT THE TAIL, AND NOTHING LESS!” (Deuteronomy 28, kjv)
But as my thoughts reminded me of this memory of my Gramps… I kind of like being the caboose of the body, the spiritual body I should say 😉 Subconsciously, It’s probably why I always referred to myself that way to be honest.
I may not be in the spotlight of a big Ministry or my name may not be dropped in circles of “the cool kids” at church, and I may not be the one everybody in church looks to for “sound spiritual wisdom…” (said in my best James Earl Jones impersonation) but ya know what?
It’s okay.
I don’t need to be that person.
The thing with being the head and not the tail is…
When you represent a BODY, SOMEONE HAS TO BE THE TAIL.
It doesn’t mean I’m not entitled to all of those amazing blessings. It just means in the circles I run…I head up the back. And again, that’s okay. I don’t think it was meant to be any other way. I come from a family of being the rear end of the Body, hahaha It’s a big responsibility to be the last cart on the train. The things we do aren’t ever seen, only by God.
To me? That’s BIG STUFF.
There’s no crowd telling me how good I’m doing or no smiling faces to show me approval.
It’s just whomever comes across my doorstep for rest and security….and God. Not many people can handle it, but He knew my family could.
Some have said I could “possess so MUCH more” and be entitled for “great things,” but how foolish to think the part I play in the Kingdom hasn’t already given me those things?
That they actually already ARE those things to me?
I’m an evangelist.
Not the kind who speaks to crowds of thousands.
But the kind whose never met a stranger.
The kind who bumps into a pregnant unwed teenager in the bathroom of a Wal-Mart, and shares a glimpse of hope to her future.
The kind who has a “spiritually divine” appointment with someone who was lost in the cracks of Sunday morning church or Saturday afternoon visitation.
Wondering around the train, finally needing a place to sit for awhile and be safe…And when they get there, they’ll find me.
And God willing 😉 I’ll do my part.

Choo-Choo!!
CHERyL