WRITTEN: October 13th 2011

No matter how hard you try and stay true to yourself there will always be those people who decide to misrepresent you. 
Maybe they feel they have good reason, Or they have no other reason at all other than to be cruel. 
Possibly they’re miserable with how they view themselves so to make their own self esteem higher they decide to shoot flames about someone who is genuine. 
People flock to that shit too. People as in others who are just as nasty, miserable and bored who have nothing better to do than feed off of misrepresentations of others. I think it’s disgusting how certain people love to tear someone down whom they have never even met. Not one hello…smile or second of any conversation yet they take in all that was said to them about you, only to place in their mind what they assume is truth. 
The worst part is when that ugly excuse for a human being decides to share with you all that has been said . What do you do? 
Defend yourself?
What’s the point? You’ve already been portrayed as this heartless animal which could not be farthest from the truth. 
I hate people like that. They feel as though they have everything figured out about you when in fact they don’t know shit because all that had been presented to them was lies and fabrications of ignorance. You can TRY to set things straight but honestly if I had it to do over I would laugh my ass off at the jealousy to which this misrepresentation came from. I mean it MUST be jealousy. 
Jealous of who you truly are. 
Beautiful,
kind,
loving,
genuine,
forgiving…All the things the source of bullshit desires to be but can’t get it together enough to accomplish it. So they lash out to make themselves feel better, look better when in all actuality they aren’t. 
Misery LOVES company and people who are miserable want to make those around them either just as miserable or make them the cause of ALL their problems in life. Well, do what you will…But I learned a VERY long time ago eventually, you WILL reap what you sow and there will be NO ONE to blame for it but yourself. 
You can be the most loving person. Doing anything for anyone you love and adore but one misrepresentation and the jealous losers of the world will try to convince you THAT defines you.
Just take a deep breath and blow it out…You can fight to prove who you TRULY are but why? 
Hate breeds hate and NOTHING or no one can change what has been done to you, or said about you…
The one thing that keeps you going, that keeps you laughing and smiling is the fact you will go on being beautiful…kind…loving…genuine…and forgiving and they will STILL be the same nasty, cruel, vile, miserable assholes whose obviously jealous at the fact you can hold your glass half full despite all the ugly in the world . They don’t have the strength or the ability to know how to laugh through the saddest of times, take what life has decided to give to you and make it work. They can’t stand the fact people actually like you and that you can look in the mirror with an understanding of your past and forgive yourself for the bad choices you’ve made in your life. Taking responsibility for all the wrongs you’ve done and owning the blame is not so easy for the weak. And I do say weak because anyone who rips the confidence apart of someone who has done nothing but try and move past the fire is a very sad soul…and anyone who engages in that and attempts to dig and pick at your scars of regret is only proving you actually are better than they are. Words of hate do NOT define me. The jealous ignorance of people who have never seen my face will NOT define me. Regret, mistakes, bad choices, those things do NOT define me as a person. My perseverance, love for my children, forgiving those who have hurt my heart, standing in Christ…THOSE things WILL and DO define who I am. God knows truth and He is a just God, fair, and merciful and in that I will put all that I am and never allow ANYONE to break my confidence in what I KNOW as truth and not some fabricated stories from people so clearly jealous of who I TRULY am. Which is all they wish to be but don’t have the balls to forgive themselves for THEIR past mistakes, regrets…They can’t look into the mirror and forgive themselves for their own actions so they try to move forward by walking on the pieces of crushed spirits…But in the end I will STILL be moving forward and they will still be right where they choose to stay, in the heart of their misery and self hate. 
With every mean, cruel word ever spoken or said about me that’s fine…go ahead but guess what? 
I STILL WIN…


Selah,
CHERyL~